Monday, April 5, 2010

Star Trek/X-Men #1

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To Boldly Go Where- Wait, X-Men and Star Trek? Seriously?



74 comments:

venatus said...

excellent review linkara, and thanks for commenting on those heels, I know there not usually a big deal but shoe's like that have been a long standing pet peeve of mine in action and super hero stories

DigiRanma said...

Great review, I actually have this comic... yeah, I'll go force myself to watch Enterprise later...

To clear up WHY Marvel did this in the first place, it's because they were coming out with a line of Star Trek comics a few months later and they wanted the original series characters to team up with the biggest names they got, so enter the X-Men...

Yeah... in hindsight, I should've said out loud WHY this comic was around before I bought it...

Penguin General said...

Wow, just wow really bad comic but do you think a Star Wars/Star Trek would be any better?

Frankie Addiego said...

I don't have time to watch/listen to the whole thing (I caught the first five minutes or so), but I can think of a lot of links between the X-Men and Star Trek.

1) They both started out in the sixties, but were canceled (I think both in 1969) and became more popular in the late seventies, when they were reintroduced.

2) They're both in the tradition of classic science-fiction, which is to say they're about metaphors and ideas.

3) Each found a renewed interest when newer characters were introduced, and there were spin-offs from each. The X-Men really didn't become popular until the newer X-characters (Wolverine, Storm, etc.) were introduced in the mid-seventies, and Star Trek's return to television in '87 with TNG had a wholly new cast of characters.

4) As a result, they were each huge in the early-to-mid-nineties.

5) While Picard probably isn't in this, and it was years before Patrick Stewart would play the role of Xavier; fandom was hoping for him to play the roll for years.

6) There's a guy named McCoy on each team.

7) Each not only had a multicultural cast of characters, but helped popularize doing so in the area of sci-fi/superheores/action for kids.

8) The X-Men is about a fictional "race" while Star Trek gives us several-dozens of them.

9) Isn't there some intergalactic space... whatever that the X-Men often team up with (I forget what they're called, but it's with L'landra and Gladiator, etc).

10) Peter David.

Also, an "ink assist" is someone who helps an inker with the background, and "spots blacks," which means that if there's a large area of solid black (sometimes the penciled fills it in and sometimes it's indicated with the letter X), the ink-assist fills it in with solid black ink.

Anonymous said...

good review

Penguin General said...

Also, seeing as I forgot to ask in my first comment, who was that at the start?

Mellow Filmmaker said...

I think so many people worked on this comic, because after they drew or inked a page or two they realized they were illustrating complete crap. The episode reenactment was hilarious

SchweitzerMan said...

Great review, been looking forward to this one ever since it was announced. Though I must admit, I was expecting it to be a cross over with TNG, not TOS. Oddly enough, I once came across a novel that had the X-Men interacting with Picard's crew...for the SECOND time.

Yeah, someone was crazy enough to cross over X-Men and TNG twice. Maybe like the "Dr. McCoy" joke, it was just a build up to mention how Picard looks a lot like Professor X

Dodger Of Zion said...

Oh crap. Now I have THAT song stuck in my head like Trident in a sheepdog's coat. Another excellent review that still has me laughing, Lewis.

Seeing Pollo in uniform was far too many kinds of cute.

...and did my eyes deceive me, or was that an iPad?

Mountain King said...

I really have been looking forward to this review and I'm glad I wasn't disappointed. Great fun, as a fellow Star Trek fan I loved the various references you've put in.

I'm not sure what else to say. You've done a great review and in your usual style.


Thomas

Oh yes, as a fan fiction crossover writer... hey, our plots are a lot stupider than this!

Anonymous said...

The problem with Crossovers is that they are very hard to do well but very popular sense you can take two big franchises and put them together.

Maybe for the anniversery they wanted to do something totally off the wall...somethine completely unexpected.

Lewis Lovhaug said...

"Wow, just wow really bad comic but do you think a Star Wars/Star Trek would be any better?"

Probably not, but it seems like it'd make more sense.

Erin said...

Well, at least it didn't involve whales, but Gary Mitchell?! Seriously?!

Loved the episode reinactment!

Marc Reyes said...

@DigiRanma

and Marvel did have their "Paramount Comics" imprint, which was intended to do comic versions of popular Paramount movie franchises. Also, said imprint also came out with a Mission Impossible comic that was drawn by, you guessed it, Rob Liefeld. (May have been only the cover, but still...)

And as others have said, crossovers only work if they make sense or are just awesome (see the "Marvel Vs." series of games). If you have nonsensical crossovers that really serve no-purpose (X-Men/Star Trek), it just ends up being a confusing mess.

Benjamin Land said...

You corrected yourself where you didn't need to, Linkara. Chekov IS the Enterprise's navigator; Sulu's the helmsman.

jdude907 said...

I actually think having super-being punch a starship is pretty awesome! I mean, picture if Superman punched the Enterprise-D's shields hard enough to send it flying. It wouldn't make TOTAL sense, but it'd be justified by the coolness factor.

Vezon said...

The machine that goes PING! I just squee'd at that line.
Also, it says a lot about your take on Watchmen (and you in general) that, even now, you don't want to spoil the story for potential new readers.

Puddle Jumper said...

Oh dear sweet jesus what the hell is this. I honestly have no idea how to react to this. I mean, never before in my life have I ever imagined this to occur. It's like seeing Scott Bakula Quantum Leaping in to Mister Rourke from Fantasy Island.

James said...

Good review, though I do have to disagree with one point. Crime shows such as Monk and Columbo were successful even in episodes where the killer was revealed at the start. The drama there lies in how the detectives find evidence to prove the killer is guilty. Though this does work better in a visual medium, not, as you mentioned, a novel format.

Sage o' G-fruit said...

Great review Lewis.

I'm still pushing for a review of the Twilight comic though. WE WILL BREAK YOU! 8P

Lotus Prince said...

Regarding your hypothetical about The Matrix being ruined by a text crawl that explains what the matrix is...well, that's EXACTLY what happens (narration rather than text crawl) in the movie Dark City. It ruined the mystery of the movie, and made the big reveal toward the end be an "ah, so now they're showing me what they've told me" rather than "woah, did NOT see that coming."

Great movie, but what a terrible decision about its opening.

Anonymous said...

Your everyday life must be very stressful since your an internet reviewer, Power Ranger, starship captain, whatever your actual job is and various other things that you'll introduce or that I forgot

Fieryone said...

Great review Linkara, and on the subject of Star Wars/Star Trek it probably would make sense, but I think the major problem is how would the Star Trek cast explain the Star Wars technology? Seeing as Techno-babble has always been a major part of Star Trek an all.


I say this because well honestly I have yet to see anything in Star Wars explain in some Science Fictiony way of how the the technology works. Plus Star Wars technology is always being exagerated, like how in the Novelization of Revenge of the sith. The writer claimed a heavy turbolaser could take out a whole city, in one shot. Wouldn't that kind of power blow through a set of shields easily?

Just saying is all, but still I'd go bananas for a Crossover like that.

ShadowWing Tronix said...

"Lady, you just reinvented stupid."

Darn it, Linkara, I had Kool-Aid in my mouth!

Bonus points for "Star Trekkin'".

SchweitzerMan, there is a sequel comic that has the TNG crew being zapped into the X-Men's world. It ends with a set-up to the novel team-up, making the novel (which I haven't read) a sequel to the comic.

It's not that much better.

Nicholas said...

Great review, but why oh why did you have to make me listen to Star Trekkin' again? 3 times in one lifetime is 2 1/2 times too many.

Also, it should be noted there's also a Star Trek: TNG/X-Men crossover novel: http://www.amazon.com/Planet-Star-Trek-Next-Generation/dp/0671019163
I've seen it on the shelves at my local library, but have yet to muster up the morbid curiosity to read it. This review didn't help it's chances, either.

Scott said...

Yes! I absolutely LOVED how much you went into the art, plot, and overall problems with the comic. This is defiantly one of your better reviews. Awesome job! :D

rhanlav said...

*coughs* Okay, great review Linkara, but next time I need to remember not to be eating dinner while watching this week's At4W. I about choked on a chicken nugget when Poyo shows up at the end.

Otherwise, great review as always.

BFE said...

I actually remember buying this back in the day. It was at the same time of the great 1990's speculator bubble and thought it would make me a mint. Yeah. I was stupid back then

Later on, I actually got around to reading it. I didn't think it was bad so much as boring and pointless.

Loved the "Dr. McCoy!" bit, though. Still do.

Rattrap007 said...

great work as always. Yeah it is indeed a stupid cross over. There was also a TNG novel called Planet X I remember seeing. Never bought it or read it. My guess is it is as stupid as this comic.

I think it is fantastic you manage to get your parents in on the act and they go all out. Your mom was hilarious man. Either they are super nice folks who are willing to do just about anything for their kid, or they are fellow nerds and will do goofy stuff for fun and a laugh.

J. J. Ramsey said...

Bonus points for 'Star Trekkin''."

Oh, yeah, definitely agree there. May have been the perfect way to cap off the review.

mightysamurai said...

A Star Trek/Star Wars crossover?!

Oh dear lord. I can't think of anything that would inspire more internet flamewars than that.

And you just know they'd have the Federation and the Alliance get into a "misunderstanding" so they can slug it out together in typical comic book fashion. God, could you imagine the nerd rage from that?

SchweitzerMan said...

Thanks for the info Shadow Wing.

Linkage said...

I actually read the TNG/X-men novel. It involved a planet where some of the population was starting to become mutants. They were quickly rounded up by the government and quaranteened.

Much of it was from the perspective of one of the new mutants who had it rather rough. And of course, one of the mutants decided that his people should be in charge and take over.

It was a decent story, but it really didn't need the whole crossover thing.

Paul S. said...

You know what would have been awesome?

Star Trek/Legion of Super Heroes.

NGT said...

You don't look too good at the start of the review, man. Maybe it's the lighting, but have you been getting enough sleep? I know weekly reviews are an article of faith with us but after the Power Rangers stuff you could have just skipped one, we would be okay.

You know, I remember a novel along the same lines I kept seeing in Barnes and Noble for the longest time. I notice a couple of other people have mentioned it too.

One thing I do have to comment on right away is that the TOS crew? They don't react to the X-men's outfits as crazy, and you know what? That makes perfect sense! They've been so conditioned by years of encountering Theiss fashion that it doesn't phase them anymore! (If this were Picard and Friends I'd expect at least a couple perfunctory comments on the outlandishness of this Earth-born humans' getup.)

Maybe Beast found the commissioning plaque. I bet it has a really cool depiction of every previous ship with the name, too. Commissioning plaques are neat like that.

You know, Spock's face is consistantly recognizeable but McCoy and Kirk are frequently off-model. (And that was Nurse Chapel? For real?)

I don't know, I like the nerve pinch bit. I admit it's the old "prove you're badass by beating up Worf/Wolverine" routine but it still amuses me to see him get taken down so easily.

I've gotta admit, you're right. It does look surreal, mainly because of Wolverine.

There should have been at least some hilarously meta commentary about meeting actual superheros, unless the Eugenics Wars erased the concept from the popular mind. Which brings me to my next point: WHY THE FUCK DIDN'T THEY DRAW THE PARALLEL TO THE MUTANTS/EUGENICS WARS. WHY ISN'T KIRK FREAKING OUT ABOUT ANOTHER BUNCH OF KHHHAAAANNNSSSSS ONBOARD HIS SHIP. WHY CAN I THINK OF A BETTER SETUP FOR THIS COMIC THAN THEY CAN IN FIVE MINUTES.

Hey, it worked for Law & Order: Criminal Intent.

And you got everything else from the halfway point.

greenjeans said...

It's amazing how we'll probably never see Superman and Flash Gordon team up (which would, you know, make perfect sense), but we will see stuff as bizarre and goofy as this. I actually own this comic, and truthfully one read was enough to convince me this wasn't the best team-up idea in the world.

What is it with stupid crossovers in comics (Superman vs. Terminator, Archie vs. Punisher, X-Men and TREK)? Do they just get off on pointless mismatches?

SignNinja said...

Sad to say, this is not the only time the X-men and Star Trek has combined. There is a Star Trek: TNG/X-men Novel that actually has Professor X in there! Now that's weird, Patrick Stewart and Patrick Stewart together in the same room.

Chris said...

The whole "Punch the ship" thing reminds me of Space Thunder Kids. It's equally as stupid.

BloodySharpie said...

Is it creepy for me to say that your mom looks a lot like mine, but with shorter and much darker hair (and no glasses)?

Also, nice use of "Star Trekkin'".

EcchiOtaku said...

As someone who writes crossover fanfics, this crossover makes no sense to me either. I at least make crossovers that make sense.

Anyway Linkara, which makes more sense to make as a com ic, this or the Cool-Aid Man comics?

Rock N Roll Martian said...

What really gets me is that this comic includes such elements as Delta Vega and Gary Mitchell, yet they still refer the Enterprise by the wrong classification. I can only assume they included the bits about Mitchell because they only watched the first episode when writing the plot.

Also, since Mitchell gained his powers from the galactic barrier, he is not, under the Marvel universe's definition, actually a mutant, so the whole issue makes even less sense.

Joe Green said...

@SignNinja-

There's this library I visit a lot that has a copy of that novel on a spinner rack.

As for this comic, I'm embarrassed to admit I actually read it when it first came out- but even then I, like Linkara, couldn't help thinking that an ST/SW crossover would have been far more logical than this.

MintWhelp said...

I dunno Linkara, but a Star Wars/Star Trek Cross Over would have killed the fans in the ensuing dehydration from all the.. uh... manly fluids it would have ensued. And dead fans buy no comic books. I think.

Also, space makes anyone's boobs look great! Because of the lack of gravity, they can get to look perkier and rounder, if you have just the right amount of fat stored on them.

Anyways, great review Linkara. You sure give a nice insight to those weird little gems that us people from other countries don't get to see --unless you wander to a comic book shop, of course--

Rurik_Niall said...

You know, the thing that gets me most about this one is the choice of pairings. Out of the entire 616 universe, they pick the X-Men? I know the X-Men were like the flagship of Marvel in the 90's, but really, it just makes no sense.

Mind you, that's not necessarily a bad thing, the problem is they tried to treat it as something fairly serious when it honestly would have been better as a sort of joke story. A comedic story about the X-Men and Star Trek would have so much potential, if you really want to have some fun with it have Deadpool tag along as well, he did originate from an X-Men title after all, so he still counts.

But if you want a serious crossover the pairing needs to at least make some form of sense, Silver Surfer for example, or pretty much any of the other cosmic characters. Even Death's Head would have made more sense, he's already fought with the Transformers and met the Doctor, he regularly travels through time and the multiverse, so why not add the USS Enterprise to his resume?

DerKork said...

Linkara, you... have not... used Ensign Munro...
Darn, I can't pull off a Kirk-monologue in text.
Anyways: I honestly expected Ensign Munro with the TOS phaser, but then you didn't use the "Why does god need.." speech clip from your 2010 trailer either.

Now you've got me interested in what may or may not be done with Ensign/Lieutenant Alexander "Why is Chell on the team again?" Munro.

Otherwise: The comic is... odd, even for Trek-standards. (And they had comic books with stories in which Klingons used earths horror movie characters to attack the Enterprise. Holographic ones. Yeah, I thought that too.)

Elzarynn said...

This review is pure win! The jokes... the second pilot recap... Mr. Pollo playing "Star Trekkin" when no one is looking... even the rants were dead on! It's good to know that even crappy comments contribute some good to the world. Oh, and loved the "dialogue" stinger. ADAMANTIUM RAGE!

Jon Thompson said...

This review illustrates why I hate...no, LOATHE Star Fleet!

Unless I miss my guess, the Admiral is Captain Linkara's MOTHER! The nepotism that that represents is mind-boggling!

Also, I really liked the review. But, mainly, the nepotism makes me mad!

PWBOT said...

Wait, Linkara is a member of Starfleet? Oh, so calling it now. Ensign Munroe IS Linkara's descendant. He clearly inherited the greatness that Linkara has. Great review Linkara, you really nailed the comic on where it had gone wrong. Spoiling the plot for no reason? That just makes the story uninteresting.

You only make a great reveal halfway through the story if there is still something to solve. Like how to capture the crook or how the crook committed the murders in murder mysteries.

Grant said...

Oh boy, I've been looking forward to this one for a while.

I remember I had this book when I was a kid and even then it didn't make much sense, but only because I never really grew up with the TOS. Now that I'm older, wiser and what not... Are you kidding me? They actually thought they could pull this off? This really is just somebody's terrible fanfic idea.

Also, this was a first issue? Are there really more that are part of a series? I remember vaguely in the back of the book they had a whole bunch of advertisements for other Star Trek books and some pin-ups of the two groups of characters interacting, but I can only hope I didn't see anything about a second issue. Though, similar to what you had brought up, the pin-up image of Spock engaging Beast in tri-dimensional chess was pretty neat.

As far as crossovers that might have worked, I can't really say that a Star Trek/Star Wars could be performed all to well. A Star Trek/Doctor Who story on the other hand... I'm guilty in saying yes, but to my understanding it would be improbable, but not impossible. Just to see the Enterprise come across a flying police box in the vacuum of space.

As always, great work Lewis. Oh, and just to wrap this up, OHMIGOD! He's got a Blaster figure! SQUEE!

Anonymous said...

Great review, I loved the Room reference, but that almost looked like Spoony's room in the beginning.

Kefka said...

One thing that's odd. Top Cow of Witchblade thing usually does Image. Now I've read a tiny bit of Witchblade and seen the anime and it was good but I guess every creative team has a bad comic. Ever read Witchblade? The art isn't that bad. The art in this comic seems low.

Anonymous said...

Great review! I nearly woke up my roommate by laughing so hard at the end when Pollo started playing "Star Trekkin'" xD

areoborg said...

While you can write mysteries in the classic "Who Done It" format, or in the "How's He Gonna Catch Him" format (as Columbo and Monk did there are a couple differences between those and this. The biggest difference is that they don't suddenly switch formats half way through the series.

We didn't have a Columbo episode start out cold with him arriving at the crime scene, collecting evidence, and interviewing people, but half way through the show, one of the suspects turns to the camera and announces to the audience that he did it.

Evilkritter said...

Linkara, you are right, there has never been a comic book starwars/startrek crossover. However...

http://sfdebris.com/unity.asp

ThatAtheistChick said...

LOL! When I saw the title, I knew this wasn't going to end well... XD

Mothra said...

Late reply is late, and for a out-of-place cause too. A shameless close-relative-plug is in order for my dad's recently-completed Star Wars/Star Trek crossover fancomic, which can be found at his DeviantART account. (http://blackcondorlives.deviantart.com/) It's a bit clunky in the page-order section, though, so the lack of links to the next page in the comments might ruin the POWERHOUSE EXCITEMENT. While you're at it, mourn the colored pencils that were killed during the making of the comic. *sniffs*

Anonymous said...

great review linkara this comic should have been trashed before a single pen was put to the papper, i also agree that its about time for someone to do a trek/wars cross over now with that said...
WHY!! WHY!! did you have to use that song why now its stuck in my head and driving me crazy so my only choice is to go look it up and watch it over and over until i can show it to some one else

The Occupant said...

I own the TNG/X-men crossover novel and it's just as bad as this.

Chup@Cabra said...

I had heard of this before, but I could have sworn it was ST: The Next Generation and the X_men (I clearly remember Patrick Stewart talking about the comic)?

Oh, well, a nice review of a really stupid idea (and I loved the "Gary Vs the Giant Rock comment ^_^).

Joseph said...

I might have a problem. I didn't mind that comic.

Yeah, your points are all spot on, the different sytles, the heels, the naration, the stupid basic premise. However, the final feel to me is more quirky an a little silly than outright bad.

They seemed to know both series' pretty well and gave them decent respect.

Eh, to each thier own.

Mel said...

I don't care how bad that comic was, its still a million times better than "The Room".

Kathbad4717 said...

i was waiting for the star trekkin' song that whole episode, yay!

Anonymous said...

@The Occupant: Yeah. I saw it in a bookstore, cracked it open, and read "Cyclops strolled onto the bridge with Riker" (or something to that effect).

I immediately walked away, knowing I'd never get the 27 seconds back and desperately looking for a how-to book to perform self-lobotomies.

It just FELT weird.

Shanya Almafeta said...

So you're a Power Ranger AND a time-shifted Federation captain?

Now we'll have to show your backstory in which in the distant past of the Crystal Millenium you were a Sailor Scout, and we'll have a trifecta.

The House of C.R.P said...

Speaking of bizzare crossovers, and in light of the new Doctor Who series (The Eleventh Hour was awesome. WATCH IT!), there is actually a Doctor Who/Transformers crossover.

JR said...

Great review as usual.

Have you seen this article about Power Girl's costume and feminism?:

http://goodcomics.comicbookresources.com/2009/11/30/she-has-no-head-the-boob-window-that-just-wont-die/

ben said...

I can believe most people who bought this comic let the lameness of Wolverine receiving a Vulcan nerve pinch from Spock slide due to the characters' popularity. However, the ridiculous "pinch" sound effect really makes them both look lame by association. It' a bit difficult to effectively remind myself of the writers owning the blame, and not the characters themselves.

Gyre said...

Am I the only one who wonders why the hell the Enterprise seems unable to detect people teleporting onboard, or why it doesn't even seem to have a simple feature like a security camera? Then again, this is a franchise where the ranking officers of a ship regularly go into combat situations instead of leaving that actual security.

On another note, in the movie Dark City they actually do the same exposition spoiling the entire plot. It sucks just as much there.

Anonymous said...

You were right the first time. Chekov's the navigator, Sulu's the helmsman.

Anonymous said...

With all due respect, sir, we all know "Twilight" will be forgotten in a few years (if not already).

That is PRECISELY why we egg (why beat around the bush, why we beg) for you to joke about it now.

Tom Badguy said...

Two years later but I watched this video and loved it. Thanks for letting me know of its existence, Linkara.

Cat C said...

I so want your 'Kirk' line of "Lady you just totally reinvented stupid." as a ring tone on my phone for when my parents call.

De-Ji said...

That vulcan is playing Galaga. Thought we wouldn't notice...

Mateja Kova─Ź said...

This is priceless man, things like this are simply priceless.