Tuesday, May 29, 2012

Southland Tales



This is the way the world ends - a really confusing, terrible movie reviewed by a dozen Channel Awesome producers.


PART ONE:



PART TWO:




79 comments:

The Exiled One said...

Oh, so it IS "Southland Tales".

Well, if I can sit throught both "Child's Play" reviews, I can sit throught this one. So let's see...

Trevor said...

Great googly moogly is this movie a mess.......

How did all of you survive sitting through Southland Tales without losing your minds?

Kyle said...

Ye Gods. This makes The Room look like Cool as Ice. (Thought I was going to say Citizen Kane didn't you?)

Tom Badguy said...

Hmm, I've heard good things about this movie. Odd.

ezim93 said...

This was one of the most retarded pieces of ass I have ever seen. My god that movie made no sense. When they brought up monkeys and the fourth dimension I just laughed. I am so confused and my brain hurts. Please mommy make it go away.

RKO Redux said...

Am I the only guy who kinda liked this movie?

RKO Redux said...

Am I the only guy who kinda liked this move?

Miyuko said...

this was Very worth the wait,good job..this movie is Crap though

Jeremy K. said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Volvagia said...

RKO Redux: No, you aren't. I know I do. It's not a masterpiece, it's absolutely insane, it's way too short ( I think it should be just over five hours) and the "thesis line" is more than a little dumb, but I admire it's commitment to bizarre insanity and the general "anti-typecasting" sentiment. The individual performances don't wind up doing much, but it's a brilliant ensemble statement once you step away from the film and think about what the performers are usually known for. This is certainly better than bleeping W.R. Mysteries of the Orgoneism (misspelling intentional), anyway.

Mike Perron said...

I must say I never even considered Southland Tales for this crossover. Nice choice I must say.

This movie really bothered me. I had so much hope for Richard Kelly after Donnie Darko. This movie just did not work. Kelly reminds me of M. Night Shyamalan & George Lucas. They all seem to need someone just off camera slapping their hands and telling them no every once and a while.

Oh and I hate The Killers so I simply skipped through that lip synching scene.

The best part of the movie is Dwayne Johnson looking nervous or confused. He just plays it perfectly, the eyes, fingers and small facial ticks. I find his acting gets put down a lot because he was a wrestler, but he can pull off a lot of physical acting/comedy. I wish he had a better movie career, because he is one of the most charming leading men in Hollywood in the past 15 years or so.

The best part of the review was JesuOtaku walking away on her knees. Don't know why but it cracked me up :p


Great work folks. Took a while, but it was worth it!

Jeremy K. said...

I could immediately tell this movie was pretentious and full of crap when it started using the modern interpretation of Revelation.

You know...the Left Behind interpretation.

Explanation: the interpretation they're using here that Oancitizen gave notes on? Only a couple hundred years old, and it's a very literalist interpretation. In truth, St. John wrote this while in exile to the Christians of his day to give them hope. It also symbolizes the fall of Rome.

Antichrist? Neeeeeeeeever mentioned in Revelation. A lot of the things mentioned in the "Biblical apocalypse" used by this movie and the Left Behind series? Pulled out of someone's ass.

I have studied the Bible since I was a child. I grew up with this interpretation. And actually, it's very comforting to know it's full of shit.

Bottom line: this movie even fails on its story base. Horrible on every possible level.

Mike Perron said...

Oh I forgot 2 quick things.

Justin Timberlake annoyed me as a young pop star, but he grew into his own. I don't like his music, but he is not the annoying kid he used to be. I never expected to be so impressed by him as an actor. He is not the greatest actor ever, but he keeps showing that he is competent. I don't know what it is about him, but I actually look forward to him in movies nowadays. Hell he is the 1 of 2 reasons I watched The Love Guru (the other being that it was about the Toronto Maple Leafs).

Seann William Scott is one of my favourite working actors. I wrote a blog entry on TGWTG about him. He is a complete sweetheart and I am glad he was the one that survived American Pie with a career.


I may not like this movie, however I really liked these two actors in it.

Des Shinta said...

Soooo in the At4W Universe, seeing a time paradox duplicate causes one to break into Song. That's Good to know. But you really didn't stop them from reviewing the movie.

A Comic that stumps definition by Linkara. You may have to end up revisiting those.

That has to be the largest number of reviewers participating in a single review.

And now the Seventh Linkara in a Delorian picture from last January is put into Context. Huzzah.

Yeeeeah, I've seen Donnie Darko. And Much Like both butterfly effect movies, they suck. Not surprised this didn't turn out well.

The Blue And The Gold said...

I actually kind of like this movie, though it's mostly for Sarah Michelle Geller and Seann William Scott trying something a little different in their careers.

But it could be worse, you all could have sat down and watched S. Darko (and if you choose to, I will not take the blame for it!)
Both are incomprehensible and their endings make the rest of the movie pointless but at least Southland Tales actually can spark debate, S. Darko's just means you wasted 90 or so minutes.

Also, this may be the perfect video to introduce my girlfriend to some of the Channel Awesome gang (Cinema Snob is the only member she knows), since it has Doctor Who references and I'm fairly sure she's seen Southland Tales.

Gonzo said...

Well, congratulations, you finally found something that makes the Warrior comic look coherent. Gold stars for everybody!

The bit with JesuOtaku made me laugh til I cried. The only thing missing was an accompaying Gratuitous Dramatic Thunderclap like in the movie.

Gonzo said...

Oh yeah, and because someone has to say it:

Richard Kelly, you keep using that word "pimp." I do not think it means what you think it means.

Cavalier said...

Forgive me, but the closing bit was my favorite part. Can't stop laughing about it.

Anonymous said...

Wow, where do I begin with this one? Not going to even get into the whole subject of this film since it's above me. Well, what I understand anyway. Few nitpicky observations. This film is so bizarre I had to look it up because I didn't believe it was real. I actually saw some good ideas in the mess, but bogged down by so much crap that they don't matter. I have to say, I know all the work you put in for this one but this may have been a case of to many cooks. No one really contributed anything, and yes I know that was the point but the review was kind of dull. The only good bits were Film Brain who actually explained the backstory and, well, that's it. There was nothing funny or charming in it. Not saying it was bad, at all, but not one if my favorites either. Even the ending seemed like it was going somewhere cool and it didn't, but I'll take a bttf reference any day. Great job on this even if it wasn't the best video I've seen on here.

13th Doctor said...

One word for this movie: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Jonathan M said...

I haven't finished watching this review yet, but, did you seriously record some of this at magfest and some at the 4th year? That's what it looks like...and that is genius..

Lewis Lovhaug said...

"I haven't finished watching this review yet, but, did you seriously record some of this at magfest and some at the 4th year? That's what it looks like...and that is genius.."

Nope, all the live action bits were filmed at MAGFest, just on two separate days.

Turkish Proverb said...

...What the Frack did I just watch?

Jesse said...

My brain hurts. What did you guys do to me?

Anonymous said...

The music video is clearly a...
BIG LIPPED ALLIGATOR MOMENT!

Tim P said...

Iron Liz is credited as appearing, but I didn't see her anywhere, I don't think... Unless she was in the back in that last clip, flipping through the DnD book...?

Lewis Lovhaug said...

"Iron Liz is credited as appearing, but I didn't see her anywhere, I don't think... Unless she was in the back in that last clip, flipping through the DnD book...?"

Yep, that was it.

Phantom Roxas said...

This was a fantastic crossover, and well worth the wait. It also helped Film Brain's remark about Battleship work its way into the film. Congratulations to everyone involved for their hard work!

JoeCat said...

Film Brain: "How did I get here?"

Silly Film Brain. Linkara's the 7th Doctor. He can summon Brits at will.

And yeah. That last clip was Iron Liz flipping through a book in the background while Dodger of Zion sung/lip-synced for the camera.

areoborg said...

And now we have an image of the 7th Doctor driving a DeLorean. Time has now folded back on itself into an infinite circle of awesome!

Wallace Shawn wants to rule the world? Inconceivable!

Anonymous said...

I'm not sure what an aneurysm feels like but I think I was starting to have one by somewhere around half way through the second part, took watching the Critic's latest video to help me out of it.

Fiery Little One

Ming said...

My God, that was one long and confusing mind-screw that dares call itself a film. I've seen Donnie Darko, but this is bad. Not even Wikipedia and the summaries on the comic could actually help to understand what really happened.

Great review on this pretentious film. I didn't expect you guys to do a film like Southland Tales for MAGFest. That's a lot of appearances by various characters as well as a surprise appearance by Doc Brown's DeLorean time machine.

Are you going to do Southland Tales the comic anytime soon?

Deraj said...

What in the nine flaming rings of hell did I just watch?! Dear Vishnu, Allah, Zeus, Odin, Buddha, God, Yahweh that was by far the most confusing piece of "cinema" I ever saw and I only saw a few clips of it. Frankly I don;t know how you guys could sit through two and a half hours of that!

PS WHERE DID YOU GUYS GET A DELOREAN?!

DMaster said...

I think we officially have the biggest mindf*** ever covered on the entirety of Channel Awesome. The Legend of the Titanic, Spider-Man & the Fantastic Four in Brain Drain, Superman Meets the Quik Bunny, Ali Baba & the Gold Raiders, The Secret of Nimh 2, the Silent Hill comics, the Warrior comics, Tekken - Blood Vengeance, Master of Martial Hearts, WTFIWWY, Sucker Punch, Epic Movie, Bear, Pulse 2 & 3, the House of the Dead movies, Final Fantasy X-2, Pumpkinhead's Revenge, Sweet Movie...THIS. THIS is somehow the one that outdoes it all. ALL.

boooratt said...

- Pimps don't Commit Suicide!!!

I've got soul, but I'm not a soldier!

I'm strangely interested in seeing this film now for some reason... must be the levels of crazy in it is the same as my own. That or i liked Donny Darko and am willing to see what the hell the same guy can do!?
I saw the images too of the DeLorian. Funny how you can see some one ran off the real looking soldier standing in the frame in that shot!
17:21-hey, that makes it easier for the aliens to slurp it up now! They don't complain on how ya'll eat!
13:00-Puntastic!
End of Part: 2

Funny thing a lot of comedy actors love to ruin their careers with crappy dramas and thrillers...
I still say you need to read Alien Vs. Predator Vs. the Terminator!
I really wanta read that draft of Holes script!!
End of Part: 1

When did they review Dragonball: Evolution?

I actually kind of like shows that take advantage of the not telling you hot things work thing... hell I think that's part of the joke in like Hitchhiker's Guild, MiB, Doctor Who, ect... Like in the new MiB movie chocolate milk eases headaches caused by timeline changes, or in Hitchhiker's Guild with the meaning of life being the number 42, or anything dealing with time travel and paradoxes the easiest cop-out is that time=lines are constantly splitting off so all you're doing is making an infinite more universes!

vlademir1 said...

This was imminently enjoyable as far as the reviewing, jokes and whatnot... too bad it had to remind me this movie existed.

I swear that Richard Kelly just keeps trying to be David Lynch and failing.

Volvagia said...

DMaster: Really? Two Points 1. Well, because Kelly's inspired by David Lynch, the mind-screwy nature is likely intentional. (which they refuse to get into) 2. Is it REALLY worse than: A rapping dog, The Fantastic Four using OfficeMax to beat Doctor Doom, the QuikTARDIS, a Joseph Lai dub-job, Evil Martin the Rat, Christabella, the Terrain of Testament, the hypersonic Rocket Panda, a Korean knockoffnime, a pure fanservice show that pretends it's deep in the last episode, Real Life Idiots, Zack Snyder refusing to understand cultural history and giving girls from the 1960s HIS fantasies instead of what those people would actually imagine in that scenario, Seltzerberg, a Sentient Bear after revenge, Internet Ghosts, Uwe Boll incompetence, Shuyin, a lazy video game based on a schlock movie and a woman MASTURBATING INTO CHOCOLATE?

Barachiel said...

Wow, when I saw that Delorean I nearly fainted. I was leaving work, here at Virginia Tech, pulling up to the main stoplight off campus, and a Delorean pulled up beside me. With Virginia plates saying "88MPH".

The very one in this vid.

I don't know who was driving it, but that was an odd bit of serendipity. Next year, I gotta go to Magfest.

日本文化のマニアック said...

I flip through the comments and I'm glad to see I'm not alone: every review I've read and seen of this movie has made me want to watch it more.

Seriously. This looks so absurdly, ridiculously bad that I figure with a few drinks to lighten my mood I'll love it - when I'm tipsy, I find everything funny. It just seems so... perfectly stupid.

Bellarius said...

"When did they review Dragonball: Evolution?"

Y Ruler of Time, MasakoX and a few other fans banded together to review it. If you watch it, brace yourself for when LordKat appears.

As for the crossover itself; this is probably one of the best and worse crossovers i've ever seen. The best because of the scale you did it in, including lots of elements not seen in usual crossovers like the DeLorean. You had people with knowledge behind the film's meanings giving further information, a lot of funny minor sketches and a wide variety of reviewers taking this thing to bits.
The bad is that this is Southland Tales, which has a plot which when explained in 20 minutes forced me to repeatedly stop before my brain cells committed suicide.

I did laugh a lot at the opening evil chair spin joke.

Sarah said...

So, did the world end at the end of the movie, or did it not?
I'm confused!

Jarkes said...

My god... I don't even...

Jarkes said...

Also, I kept waiting for Phelous to shout "Great continuity!" at some point.

Nathan said...

This movie is filled with plot points, side characters, sub-plots, exposition, and enough attempts at 'satire' that anyone who watches it will end up so confused they may end up on Nash's WTFIWWY.

I understood nothing of this "tale" even with the attempted cliff notes.

Away from that nice review and I await next year's MAGfest cannon fodder.

Chris K. said...

Please tell us that there will be an outtakes video, and hopefully a commentary involving most, if not all, of the contributors.

Kanashe said...

Film Brain needs to re-check his sources on the Box movie, since it had nothing to do with the Apocalypses or time travel, since it was more implied that aliens were involved and that they were studying the human race to see if they were worth keeping alive or not. Aaaan now I'm gonna do a large explanation on Southland Tales, sooo..please bear with me. You see the main issue with Southland Tales is that Kelly set out to write a modern day Philip K. Dick novel, but what we learned from movies like No Country for Old men is that what works great in a book, doesn't always transfer well into a movie. Same story here, not to mention during a Q&A for this movie, Kelly said that he couldn't make an ending. This is the biggest flaw by far, when you set out to write something THIS huge, you need to have a planned ending, an he didn't. When you set up to write the great American novel, you just don't do it, such things happen on impulse. Not to mention, majority of critics weren't haiting the movie, they were just confused, since the movie tried to act that it was smarter than the audience.

Rhodoferax said...

Unfortunately, I have to say that this review didn't really work for me.

Don't get me wrong, there is good stuff in there - Oancitizen's discussion of the Book of Revelation was brilliant, the Chick talking about cock and Nash being pregnant made me laugh out loud, and I quite liked all the background gags.

However, the review didn't seem to have that many jokes in it; mostly, it's just you guys describing what happens. Granted, it would probably be hard to make a joke about a movie this insane, but still, maybe you could have even tried describing events in an amusing way?

Also, it was a very cool idea to bring in so many reviewers, but I think you may have bitten off more than you could chew. I like the crossovers because they let us see the characters interacting with and bouncing off each other; with the exception of the opening skit, Chick talking about cock, Nash being pregnant, quantum teleportation, and the last bit at the end, most of the reviewers seem redundant, with little off their distinctive personalities or voices coming through (although Film Brain and Phelous do remain characteristically identifiable).

Now, look, I'm not trying to tell you how to do your job; Hagan knows I'm in no position to give advice. I'm trying to be constructive here, but looking at the other comments it appears I'm in a minority, so feel free to ignore me.

Lewis Lovhaug said...

"Now, look, I'm not trying to tell you how to do your job; Hagan knows I'm in no position to give advice. I'm trying to be constructive here, but looking at the other comments it appears I'm in a minority, so feel free to ignore me."

That's fine, many others have given similar criticism. ^_^ Really the amount of producers in this one came about by necessity and less by design. We recorded the Nash/Phelous/Lupa/D1 scenes the day before Nash and JO left, thus we lost their room AND Nash himself. Phelous and Lupa left halfway through filming in the other room, so we had to fill in with Chick and Todd.

marray taleus said...

Wow I so glad that I'm not the only one who felt like this movies is confusing and nonsensical. everyone I know gave it good reviews, each one saying it was profound, each one giving their own interpretation on what it means. Hell even Imdb gave it a 5.5 out of ten, suggesting that it was somewhat descent. I always thought It made no sense and that it was pretentious, douchey, and full of crap. and everyone who actually liked was also pretentious ,douchey, and full of crap. well I know you probably don't agree me to that extent. but I'm glad someone sees this movie for what it is.

Wednesday said...

I'm having trouble watching the review because every time Linkara pops on screen I get distracted by what an adorable Seventh Doctor he makes. Also because the plot is making my head implode.

(Obligatory MST3k: "Geez, Tolkien couldn't follow this plot.")

Kanashe said...

"Wow I so glad that I'm not the only one who felt like this movies is confusing and nonsensical. everyone I know gave it good reviews, each one saying it was profound, each one giving their own interpretation on what it means. Hell even Imdb gave it a 5.5 out of ten, suggesting that it was somewhat descent. I always thought It made no sense and that it was pretentious, douchey, and full of crap. and everyone who actually liked was also pretentious ,douchey, and full of crap. well I know you probably don't agree me to that extent. but I'm glad someone sees this movie for what it is."

So wait, does this make me pretentious, douchey, and full of crap? Since, I knew what the movie was going for an well KINDA liked the idea, but also realize that it badly needed an editor and someone to fix the script

Anonymous said...

This movie has made me so stupid just from being near it that I think the only thing I'll be able to put on my finals is a puddle of drool.

Dragons Dusk said...

Best
Ending
Ever!
And I'm not actually sure if I mean you getting to drive the Dolorian or Critical Marine showing up.

And if I spelled that wrong I apologize.

Nice editing, seriously, I think a lot of the added audio made it fun, especially some of the more "in" jokes, such as SWAT 4's "move over sirs."

and your 7th doctor costume is still made of awesome.

It truly boggles my mind that movies like this get funding, and yet Sanctuary got cancelled, oy.

Anonymous said...

Not to sound like JewWario, but when it comes to Southland Tales - I like it!

Every point the critics of this film have made is correct. It is an amazingly odd, unfocused piece of trite.

However it is entertaining, just to see so many actors and craftsmen work so hard to create a world falling apart despite their best efforts... kinda like the Doosers in Fragile Rock.

Oh and best guest reviewers (as far a contributing insightful review) were Ralph Oancitizen aka Kyle Kalgreen and Film Brain aka Matthew Buck.

Lewis, if you guys had only done a focused three person analytical review, it would have worked nicely as well. (But it is always nice to see the other Channel Awesome folks!)

marray taleus said...

"So wait, does this make me pretentious, douchey, and full of crap? Since, I knew what the movie was going for an well KINDA liked the idea, but also realize that it badly needed an editor and someone to fix the script"

I personally believe that if somebody was to not only like this movie, but to actually find to be deep and meaningful or to even call it a masterpiece(I've meet people who have) then there is a 90% chance that they are pretentious, douchey, and full of crap and just may not be aware of it. They should get themselves tested.

Master Control Cynic said...

"I want to suck your dick."

"Okaaaaaaaay"

I watched this three days ago, Im STILL laughing.

Zombie Expert said...

What a hateful and disgusting movie. How dare they continue to spread such prejudices and falsehoods against monkeys. It is completely ignorant and wrong for them to say that monkeys are not able to make trans-temporal journeys by virtue of their species. Monkey souls may be different than human souls but they are in no way inferior.

That commercial of the cars humping was also extremely repulsive and filled with racist subtext as the silver car's engine was clearly not on. The implication being that black cars have no qualms about having sex with unconscious white cars.

Kyle Voltti said...

I don't know why but when I watched this movie I kept thinking of the miniseries Wild Palms

Elzarynn said...

"My name's Critical Marine. I'm here to rescue you."
"Fuck, yeah."

Easily my favorite part of the video. But the rest was good too.

Loz said...

OK, this is a guess based on your review because I have no desire to see this film itself, but it looked like a rewrite of 'Donnie Darko' mixed with the last volume of Alan Moore's 'Promethea', namely that the apocalypse when it comes is an event that is entirely personal, but entirely personal to everyone simultaneously. But then wrapped up in over two hours of absolute nonsense. As for the bit about the film possibly following on from a comic, it's similar to how a key point in 'Donnie Darko' is only explained on the film website, but with nothing to indicate that the explanation is there so it's complete chance if you find it.

And to think that Richard Kelly wanted nothing to do with 'S Darko'.

Anonymous said...

I think I get the reversal of the line. Bang is being used as slang for sex. So it is set up with the elephants and the cars fucking, and ends with the writer's mind fucking yours.

Carl said...

One thing to say: wow, that was funnny and yet insightful. Well done to all of the Channel Awesome crew and especially to The Fourth Doctor-I mean Linkara, for organizing it.

Can't wait for the commentary track.

HanSK said...

You know, this thing has the potential to be one heck of an awesome TV series.
The biggest flaw of this movie is that it tries to cram WAY too much stuff into itself.

If given enough time, I'd say 3 or 4 seasons, 20 episodes each, properly developing the characters, setting, and plot lines, this could be a true epic.

America's answer to Neon Genesis Evangelion or Revolutionary Girl Utena if you wish.

You complain about too many story-lines and characters not essential to the plot, but I say that that's what makes it fun.
It's not about the destination, but about the journey!
Life is a journey!
You don't just rush for death!
This is also why I firmly believe that Sucker Punch was the greatest film of 2011, despite what other sheeple might say

I'm writing my own original fic built around this philosophy.
It does have a set ending and a main chain of events, but is more focused on the various misadventures of it's massive cast of characters, the main "story" only serving as a framing device.
My only problem is that I have come-up with too much content to ever write-down, not to mention not having enough time due to my job and a ton of other hobbies.
Still, 8 chapters were written-down (mostly character introductions)
http://www.fictionpress.com/s/2476200/1/Blue_Something_justice_for_no_one
(the first chapter kinda sucks, but I think it gets better later on)

Also, would you'r final reaction be different if instead of "Pimp" they said "bad-ass"

Plus, I actually liked the use of the reversed quote.
It has that certain feel of defiance to it.
Like being faced with you'r insignificance compared to the vast, cold, uncaring cosmos, and you just looking it straight in to the eyes, and saying "JUST WHO THE HELL DO YOU THINK I EM!"

Zelos said...

As a pimp, I find this review offensive.

Anonymous said...

You know, I've seen people defend this movie by saying that it works on emotional beats instead of conventional plot and story. After revisiting in in this review, I can't imagine what the hell was wrong with them. This movie is nothing but plot the only difference is that unlike convention, it amounts to absolutely nothing!

Anonymous said...

"This movie is nothing but plot the only difference is that unlike convention, it amounts to absolutely nothing!"

Just like our lives in this universe

what a perfect metaphor

Anonymous said...

sending monkeys in space ugh... Monkey Gone to Heaven WHY. THE. FUCK IS THIS MOVIE QUOTING THE PIXIES?

Ben Pounds said...

I know you'll hate me for saying this, but I think this is possibly a David Lynch-style movie. Maybe it's not supposed to make sense.

Cryptix said...

When I saw the trailers for this movie, it was just shortly after discovering Anthony Hopkins' "Slipstream" -- which I adore precisely *because* of all of the layers of weirdness that almost-but-not-quite make sense together -- so I really, really wanted to like this movie.

I was so disappointed.

"Slipstream" was by no means without its serious levels of pretentiousness, and I would be disappointed to never see it on Brows Held High. But at least Hopkins knew what he was doing with it (even if no one else did). It questions the boundaries of reality and moviemaking by showing a man losing track of the lines, and while you might come away from it confused, it's the same sort of confusion that you take from a Dali or an Escher.

Southland Tales, on the other hand... I can't think of a good art metaphor. Darn. The acting was mostly good, at least.

The review? Awesome. Very much worth the wait. JesuOtaku and CriticalMarine were my favorite parts, with Film Brain's first cameo coming in closely behind, followed by the much-anticipated appearance of the DeLorean.

And you rock that outfit. I'm sure you were aware of that, though.

Cryptix said...

Anonymous said:
"Just like our lives in this universe

what a perfect metaphor"

Uh... yeah. Paraphrasing the Bard: "Life is a tale told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing."

Thanks, but we didn't really need this two-and-a-half-hour ball of pretension to remind us of that.

Ryubbert Narraetsor said...

I'm surprised there was no mention of the 'stupid bunny suit' logos on the wall at timestamp 6:25....

Jesse said...

I just love how every time we cut to the hotel room, the other reviewers are just goofing off in the background.

Unknown said...

Actually in the greater cosmic sense the earth suddenly dying would go basically unnoticed so it'd be a whimper no matter what T.S. Eliot said... However the world becoming the home of a 4th dimensional being (what looked like what was happening at the end there) if the cosmic landscape was

Also I f***ing loved the pimp line, it just gets me teary eyed because it reminds me of the HBO series Hung where Tanya(the pimp) is qouted as saying to a person calling her the nick name she hate: “Don’t call me T-Brain! I’m a mother f***ing pimp!”

Anonymous said...

I watched the Holes movie in elementary school (and it was okay for a kids film) ,and there are tons of reasons why I'm glad Kelly's script didn't make the final cut: First of all, even if it did get passed who would a NUCLUER HOLOCAUST get a PG Rating; Secondly, how would that even work? Thirdly, fans of the book would be really ticked at th idea; and finally,and most obvious of al.....THAT'S JUST STUPID!...and I just realize that I wasted everybody's time

Anonymous said...

Forget the live action transformers movies, for the asylum films, forget the stuff Spoony reviewed, forget Garbage Pail Kids, this the worst movie EVER! Just watching it get reviewed gave my a sensory overlord.

Anonymous said...

Holy MOTHER OF FREAKING GOD!!! This movie is without a doubt, one of the most idiotic stupid nonsensical, mad rambling, pretentious, incoherent, metta piles of cinematic crap i have ever seen in my entire life. Seriously, up until now i was only aggitated over bad comedy films, but this... THIS MOVIE TOPS ANY BAD MOVIE I HAVE SEEN, either as a review or actually seen.

I, by all the heavenly blessings in the world, thank god that i never heard of this movie back in 07-08 when it came out, because i'm very convinced that this is a movie, that would've destroyed a good chunk of my knowledge.

Oh and by the way, i read that so called "prequel saga" in a comic book store, and you were right. Outside of the crappy artwork that looks like a bunch of doodles, it is so badly written and incomprehensible that i vowed to myself i would never by it at all.

So now that i got that outta my way, a few questions about the review itself

1). Was this review partly inspired by the agony booths mega recap of it, or was it a review you always wanted to do?

2). How did you get everyone on board for the review?

3). Please tell me you spared them all the horror of having to sit through this movie?

4). How come it took so long to get out? Not that i have a problem with that, just curious

Anyway, i never saw this movie, never heard of it, and i intend to keep it that way.

Lewis Lovhaug said...

"). Was this review partly inspired by the agony booths mega recap of it, or was it a review you always wanted to do?"

Only in that I had never heard of it until their Mega Recap.

"2). How did you get everyone on board for the review?"

I decided that because the movie had characters going in and out of the movie seemingly at random, I could apply the same principle here and if people needed or wanted to leave we would swap them out.

"3). Please tell me you spared them all the horror of having to sit through this movie?"

Yup. It's a long movie and I didn't feel the need to make people watch it. Some, like Todd, Nash, and Film Brain had already seen it.

"4). How come it took so long to get out? Not that i have a problem with that, just curious"

A lack of a script, mostly. See, because it wasn't ESSENTIAL to do this crossover, I decided to put it at the bottom of the priorities list. As a result, I just had scene ideas compiled from notes, but no actual script. We filmed as much as we could and it took me a few months to write it, mostly because I was also working on the storyline finale for February. After that, it took me some time to finish things up, but the result is what you see.

Anonymous said...

Sorry for this, but honestly there is seriously so much stupid in here that it's either worth addressing or trying to forget about it, in this case, i know you made the point about the movie's reversal of the T.S. Eliot quote, but my question: Why bring up the Robert Frost poem? The idea behind that poem is "I took the Road less traveled by and that has made all the difference," is a metaphor for the path people take in their lives. "The Road less traveled by" it's suppose to reference going with the crowd or making your own way. This seriously makes me wonder if Richard Kelly even bothered to do actual research on the things he "references" or "Quotes" in the movie.

Oh and one quote i read on the blip page, referred to this as "The Dark Knight Strikes Again: THe Movie," with the nonsensical dialouge, things that are supposed to be deep and meaningful just come across as nonsensical and pretentious, and unnecessary satire.

Anonymus said...

What exactly is your personal history with Southland Tales, I always wanted to know why you wanted to do a review of it. You have so much vitriol for this movie and comic but I never know what your personal vitriol behind it is.