Monday, November 5, 2012

Flash Comics #1



The fastest man alive! ...until the other Flashes came along, anyway.


63 comments:

PanicAttack said...

Actually, "hard water" is water with a high level of mineral content, usually calcium or magnesium.

Robyn said...

So, was the word "scrub" used as an insult back then, or is Joan referring to him as a towel boy? I'm just as confused as you were in that review.

I laughed my ass off at him just turning around and smoking in the lab. Yeah, that won't cause anything bad to happen...

This review was hilarious. I'm looking forward to the other secret origins.

Ake Polak said...

Why is there no "We'll be back in a moment" intermission?

Draco Ro'Tor said...

I will now be psychic: I predict you will hear all about peoples' hard water buildup problems in the comments for the next week.

megaL3 said...

Ah, the flash. The fastest man alive. I love these characters and Jay Garrick has always been my favourite of them all, though I mostly grew to love him through JSA, like you. I enjoyed this review and am looking forward to the rest of secret origins month.

Just wondering, will you look at the hawkman and Johnny Thunder stories eventually?

Lostshadows said...

So, no water softener + steam shower= super powers!

I've always loved Flash's origin because of that goof.

areoborg said...

I believe that the football scrub thing meant that he tried out for the team but didn't make it. Though in this case, it seems to be a term for bench warmer, since he's obviously on the team.

Hard Water is just water with minerals in it. Its safe to drink, and most places in the US have hard water, unless they're using a water softener.

"The gas injects him like a vaccination..."
And now I'm having images in my head of a human-shaped gas cloud with a syringe...

Why does it surprise you that necromancy is Plan A when Satan is one of the key members of this group?

Anonymous said...

"So, was the word 'scrub' used an insult back then?" Yes. Scrub meant (and still means) someone who is not inexperienced at something, but is just not very good at it. So he is a member of the team who isn't very good.

Anonymous said...

Wonder if any poor kid decided to try using hard water to actually increase their speed.

And if it's known that these chemicals induce speed then why is this guy the first one to have this done?

And lastly Joan. Ah, old comics where a woman could just exist to be lusted after by the main character, have little personality of her own and apparently only be willing to date someone if they were really good at sports. So glad that seventy years later we've moved past all that... huh.

Anonymous said...

Iconic = the stuff the creators grew-up with
or
the stuff that appeared in most media
choose you'r pick

Reincarnation of Mercury...
you know, now I understand where they got the idea for his current origin
And yeah, I understand why they changed it

But let's be fair, most people would use the powers for personal gain
not everyone is Light Yagami...

And yeah, while I personally LOVE the New 52 and think it's the best thing to happen to American comics in decades, I'm not happy about the Justice Society being sidelined like that
Most of it comes from the obsession of DC's execs and writers to have the Justice League as the first superhero team
Mind you, that the Silver Age did not acknowledge the Golden Age, and they eventually had to solve it by making them into two separate universes
And I personally REALLY did not like the solution they came up with after Infinity Crisis
By having the Justice Society exist BEFORE Superman's and Wonder Woman's arrival, they took away all of their relevancy! They essentially just were two more freaks in a world that's been flooded with them for decades.

If I was to reboot the DC univwrse, I'd have Superman be the world's first superhero, and the Justice Society the first superhero team, with the Justice League only appearing later in the time-line (does not need to be too long), inspired by the JSA
Of course, that would probably cause the writers and execs to complain about it making the characters look too old, or making the heroes they grew-up with look less important (personally, I can't wait to have the 90s kids take charge)

Daniel T. Stack said...

Why do I get the feeling you have been wanting to use that song in the review ever since Tandem the Spoony's use of it in D-20 Live.

Great use of the Iron Man song to intro the next comic.

What would you do if that particular Satan's death was the origin to Mephisto?

I know I know not a chance but still given the name he started with he might as well been named Disposable Goon. Oh with Power because Satan always has power right?

I'd like to see someone write a Ret-con where The Flash actually is the reincarnation of Mercury and just see how the Themescurans (Never sure on the spelling of that.) react to it.

boooratt said...

And that kids is how LSD was made!
...or meth!?


I can say one good thing about this speedster's origins it is better that the 1st Marvel one. The Whizzer!!! He got his super speed from mongoose DNA!

I do agree though hey did "Speed" through this origins!

Well, I can explain why he doesn't wear a mask and no one can recognize him when in costume he uses his super speed o vibrate his face so it is blurred out... like he's one of those eyewitnesses on those crime shows whose face is blurred out and their voice altered.

You do know the clip you should've played there instead of the MST3K one was the Family Guy one!
"[cutaway to a man ordering food in the 40's]
Man: Steak and donut sandwich, please.
Waiter: You want cigarettes on that sandwich?
Man: What do I look like, a Mary? Yes, I want cigarettes!"

Nothing is more subtle than naming a villain Satan or Lucifer!


Can't wait for the Iron Man one because I sure there is all sorts of old fashion Asian racism!

Daniel T. Stack said...

Ake Polak has a good point. Its not like bumpers have to be single use things. Sure this time you re-used the title card but all those video bumpers you did before could be reused no problem. Its actually kinda normal to reuse them. All of Transformers Gen-1 had maybe 8-12 bumper animations?

Rabbi Joe said...

I'm glad you gave James Robinson some well-deserved compliments. The only good thing to come out of Zero Hour was his Starman (actually, Starmen), which led to that JSA comic you mentioned. In fact, my first comic ever was the final JLA-JSA team-up before Crisis (JLofA 232), so I've loved those Golden Agers as long as I've been reading comics. Mark Waid also did a great job of integrating the older speedsters as well in his Flash run, not only Jay, but Johnny Quick and Max Mercury as well.

harmonicajay said...

Jay is and always will be my favorite Flash. He was pretty dumb back then though. I actually bought a digital copy of Flash Comics #1 and found it underwhelming myself. I honestly couldn't follow some of the dialogue. I guess Gardner Fox was more in the creative side of things than he was a writer. Though he did write the first Justice League story so maybe he developed. Can't wait for next week. Oh, how little Tony Stark has changed.

Rabbi Joe said...

What? You didn't end the review with TLC's "No Scrubs"?

Nick Michalak said...

PLEASE, tell me we're getting Drunk Tony next week! I LOVE Drunk Tony Stark!

Also, I'm really liking the new AT4W logo. It's very cool!

The Monocle Man said...

It has since been retconned that all the gases did was connect Jay Garrick to the Speed Force.

This is the DC universe. Maybe Serge Orloff is a nercromancer?

So...are the Faultless Four DC's version of the Frightful Four?

By the way, I think "faultless" is supposed to be ironic. Come on, one of the guys is named "Satan", for crying out loud!

No storyline stuff, huh? Figures. To be fair, the whole Gunslinger thing seems to be going nowhere. We should either get some damn answers, or at least have a true confrontation between the Gunslinger and Linkara (as opposed to the one-sided curbstomps we've seen so far).

Captain Haddock said...

"Why is there no "We'll be back in a moment" intermission?"

He said why laast week: he ran out of costumes. Besides, Doug never used costumes in HIS intermissions.

"So, no water softener + steam shower= super powers!"

I've seen magic candy that makes women strong and muscular. I've seen love letters that make you grow to giant size. I've seen magic shoes that make people dance uncontrollably. I've seen a gun that shoots lasers powered by the soul of a little girl. I've seen a piece of celery that changes color whenever danger is around. At this point, nothing suprises me.

"Hard Water is just water with minerals in it. Its safe to drink, and most places in the US have hard water, unless they're using a water softener."

So yeah, Jay Garrick gets his powers from mineral water. Maybe this is just a big commercial for Evian...

"But let's be fair, most people would use the powers for personal gain
not everyone is Light Yagami..."

I'm sorry, but how is using your powers to become a psychotic serial killer supposed to be a noble use for superpowers?

"What would you do if that particular Satan's death was the origin to Mephisto?"

Wrong universe. The Devil of the DC Universe is Lucifer Morningstar.

"I'd like to see someone write a Ret-con where The Flash actually is the reincarnation of Mercury and just see how the Themescurans (Never sure on the spelling of that.) react to it."

Considering that the Themyscirans (or, you know, Amazons) of the New 52 have rejected all male deities and are psychotic feminists who kill men on sight, they would probably slaughter him.

"The only good thing to come out of Zero Hour was his Starman (actually, Starmen), which led to that JSA comic you mentioned."

Actually, the post-Zero Hour version of the Legion of Superheroes is the ONLY version of the Legion of Superheroes that I like, and I was pissed off when it was gone in the Legion Threeboot. It put a smile to my face to see them back in "Legion of Three Worlds".

Also, I keep expecting boooratt to begin his messages with "OH MY GOD, THIS IS THE GREATEST REVIEW I'VE EVER SEEN IN MY LIFE!" and end them with "This is boooratt, saying: CHANGE! YOU GOT CHANGE? OH COME ON, HELP A GUY OUT WILL YOU? COME ON, CHANGE!".






The Offender said...

I always liked the first Flash. He was the first character to only have one power, and the first superhero to seemingly be open about his being a superhero. Always struck me that a super speedster should learn some form of fighting skill, as that would be far more effective with super speed.

Frosty said...

I was kind of expecting Linksano appear in a suit saying something like "The ladies of science dig this garb..." xD ...though true Holokara made that joke not so long ago.

Kudos for bringing Diablo II up. ^^ Wonder if you played it.

JB said...

"I'll get them in the act of murder"
Yeah, Jay, endanger the lives of the people on the beach and proceed to NOT catch the perpetrator onthe act. Brilliant strategy.

Mirror room torture : I recall a similar scene in Fantastic Four #200, but that made sense : Doctor Doom was the victim and he went insane when he saw infinite reflections of his unmasked, scarred face. It seems to come from the Phantom of the Opera (Leroux's novel) which features a similar torture chamber.

Clark Kenting : DC Special Series #11 explained that at one point in his career, Garrick just outed his identity (Pre-Crisis Earth-2 version)

JB said...

For philosophers, this comics submits a new omnipotence paradox : Jay can think swifter than thought. Huh ? Well, at least, the various speedsters comics justify the walls of text during action sequences.

Finn Hutchinson said...

"Actually, "hard water" is water with a high level of mineral content, usually calcium or magnesium."

Well, they probably did mean heavy water since hard water doesn't really have many effects on humans other than being... slightly better for you.

Frosty said...

"Kudos for bringing Diablo II up. ^^ Wonder if you played it."
...Actually meant Starcraft there, after WoW and Diablo were mentioned.
Just my fingers are faster than my brain at times. >.>

Anonymous said...

The Faultless Four kinda reminded me of villains from an old anime for some reason.

Anonymous said...

well...at least it didn't have the classic "love my alter-ego" that superman had, hell, if anything, i find it more interesting that the girlfriend knows about that. that is kind of original.

Jarkes said...

Wait... did MC Hammer steal the instrumentals for "Can't Touch This" from "Super Freak?" They're exactly the same... They don't even have the "one extra note" excuse that Vanilla Ice had...

Sijo said...

This being my first Secret Origins Month here, I must ask: are the comics being reviewed supposed to be bad? Or just any you feel are interesting? In any case, I've never seen the actual Golden Age Flash's origin story, so thanks for that. :)

On the other hand, I do know that the Faultless Four (or at least, Sieur Satan) later turned up alive (can't recall where though- probably in All Star Squadron.)

Oh, and Flash and the god Mercury DID meet once, in a teamup between the Justice Society, The Justice League and The Justice Squadron (heroes of Earth-S, the Earth that was home to the Shazam Family.) Earth-one's Flash was there too. Look it up!

arw1985 said...

That was not a good origin. I do like this Flash's costume though.

I have one question: is that supposed to be a UPS guy in the title card? If so, I think Jay would have a run for his money lol.

Gonzo said...

There's definitely something to be said for a superhero who doesn't need a massive tragic catastrophe to become a hero. Of course, there's ALSO something to be said for SHOWING the hero's first time crimebusting instead of just summarizing it in one panel.

Also, did I miss the bit where we learned Smythe's name? Because Flash kind of seems to pull it out of nowhere.

Lewis Lovhaug said...

"This being my first Secret Origins Month here, I must ask: are the comics being reviewed supposed to be bad? Or just any you feel are interesting? In any case, I've never seen the actual Golden Age Flash's origin story, so thanks for that. :)"

Not intentionally. ^_^ During the first Secret Origins month I included the disclaimer that of course standards are different today and that judging them by today's standards were a bit unfair and it was all in good fun.

It's actually rare for me to not call one of these books bad. The only one that immediately springs to mind that I disliked was Uncanny X-Men #1 since the characters were, well, jerks.

GoldenKing said...

So he can think faster than thought?

Arianne said...

I'll admit that the only Flash that I'm most familiar with is Wally West.
Ya know what I'm okay with not all Superheroes having tragic pasts.
Also,I'm looking forward to Ironman's origin and Hulk's origin story.

Greenygal said...

I've read this story any number of times, but listening to you read the dialogue incredulously made it all freshly hilarious. "The gas injects him like a vaccination." Oh Golden Age comics, you are a thing of beauty and wonder forever. Although I still think "I'm just a freak of science...anyhow...will you go to that dance with me?" is sweet. Jay has always been very clear on his priorities. *g*

Anonymous said...

Please forgive me if I sound like an ass in the following comment, but what exactly is taking Pollo's new body so long. I mean, you've been hyping it up for about more than a year and a half now(I count Star Trek #2), and so far nothing has happened. Are you waiting for the right time to reveal it, or is it really taking that long to build? If so, then can you please elaborate why it's so hard to complete? My patience is starting to run a little thin over here.

I LOVE Pollo.

Lewis Lovhaug said...

"Please forgive me if I sound like an ass in the following comment, but what exactly is taking Pollo's new body so long. I mean, you've been hyping it up for about more than a year and a half now(I count Star Trek #2), and so far nothing has happened. Are you waiting for the right time to reveal it, or is it really taking that long to build? If so, then can you please elaborate why it's so hard to complete? My patience is starting to run a little thin over here."

Pretty much two things:
-The Prop Lady is building them and not me and she has other commissions from people that I've told her she can prioritize since conventions are at specific times and I don't NEED the new Pollo bodies right away.
-She's building THREE of them and not just the one, and they can be a bit elaborate in places, so it's not like how I built Pollo originally - as cardboard, duct tape, and spray paint.

Greg Hayward said...

So Joan is saying that she "don't want no scrub"?

Anonymous said...

"Pretty much two things:
-The Prop Lady is building them and not me and she has other commissions from people that I've told her she can prioritize since conventions are at specific times and I don't NEED the new Pollo bodies right away.
-She's building THREE of them and not just the one, and they can be a bit elaborate in places, so it's not like how I built Pollo originally - as cardboard, duct tape, and spray paint."

Thanks for the update

FugueforFrog said...

Epic ending. Sort of wonder if next week is going to get into how Tony Stark essentially created The Punisher...but I'm ahead of myself here.

Basically after seeing this, I could see Jay Garrick as Snowflame before he even was the twinkle in a demented comic writer's eye. He's smoking and inhales noxious fumes from some hard water amidst typical tobacco and...bam, super-speed. At least Barry was probably a bit less ditzy regarding getting his super-powers but...50s over 40s. Regardless, there's just a goofy naivite of Golden Age comics and seeing stuff like the chamber of mirrors and "ancient Liefeld" brougth a smile to my face.

Anonymous said...

...huh.

I'm a really big fan of yours, but I don't know, this review felt really lacking in comparison to the great job you do normally. There weren't many jokes, just you saying how you dislike the DC reboot and hate One More Day, which everyone who watches this show has heard before. And I was hoping for a little more from 90s Kid than just his catchphrase. I miss when he gave a speech during the reviews. Maybe I was just spoiled by the last month of awesomeness, maybe the comic didn't have goo joke fuel, but this was not one of your best.

Dragons Dusk said...

Heavy water...
I get to look both a dork and ignorant with this comment but the only real knowledge I have about the stuff is another planet wanted it was payment in exchange for advance tech in I believe a rather early episode of Stargate SG-1.

Flash has a weird origin, though I agree with other comments made it's nice to have an origin story that's not so based out of tragedy.

I'd seen this Flash costume in the museum in scenes from the Justice League cartoon but I never knew why they wings were on the helmet, interesting.

I do think I prefer the change to the story from the live action show in the 80s (think it was the 80s) that involved lightning hitting his lab.

Fun review though.

Unknown said...

Heavy water is deuterium oxide.
Its used in older nuclear reactors.
Its also very effective at killing small animals when ingested...

Essentially drinking the stuff causes cells to stop dividing if it replaces over half the water in your body. Which is really hard to do to a human being, but really easy to do to small animals.

Jesse said...

I kinda like a cruddy origin. Shows how much the character has grown since then. Jay Garrick would be a perfect example of this. Too bad they didn't go this route but this was at least amusing.

Doresh said...

So smoking can help you in getting super powers Oo ?

I think he hides his identity by vibrating his fa... oh, that was already answered in another comment ^^

The comic makes it sound pretty easy to get super speed. I wonder why Batman (or, well, EVERYONE) never considered getting a Speedster upgrade XD

As for the new 52, I find it hard for DC to create a new legacy, seeing how their comic's timeline is all over the place. Would it really kill them to start in roughly the same time and wait maybe a year or two before releasing the first JLA comic Oo ?

Konsolero said...

"I´m Rick James Bitch" (can´t believe no one quoted the Dave Chappelle sketch so far).

I liked the episode. The Diablo-reference was very funny ^^ and i liked that you teased Iron Man´s origin with the Black Sabbath song.

I missed the story part though.

Anyway looking forward to next week

JD said...

Great episode Linkara. I always like these looks back at classic characters. Also your intro and discussion of the new 52 reminded me a bit of the video I made about comic continuity: http://geekvision.tv/2012/10/continuity/ And yeah, Jay Garrick is probably one of my favorite characters from DC and yet this origin wasn't his best story by any means.

Mitchell Martinez said...

You were too kind on this comic. I know it's easy to take the goofiness of the 40s and other qualities like that which make the Golden Age so enjoyable, but this comic was honestly bad no matter how you look at it. It would have been a lot more entertaining if you had torn into it.

William Gordon Estevez said...

I take offence to the implied insult that anyone who likes the New 52 are "90's kids".

Ming said...

Great review on the first appearance of Old Man Jay Garrick (Golden Age Flash).

Given your talk of the New 52 and Earth 2, I sometimes wonder if DC Comics had considered bringing back the previous continuity as a separate universe similar to how the Golden Age comics became a separate universe in the old Multiverse.

shikome kido mi said...

Ah, comics, teaching us all that laboratory safety regulations are the only obstacle between you and superpowers.

@Captain Haddock:
Who said Light Yagami was noble? Anonymous just said he never used his powers for personal gain. He never used them to kill romantic rivals, make money, or anything like that--just in an aid to his psychotic quest that he thought was doing the world good.
Whether or not it really was and if his growing meglomania made him lose sight of his original goals is a different discussion.

Anonymous said...

Wow, I'm lame. Even after the "SuperFreak" gag in the middle of the review, when I heard the music at the end I thought it was MC Hammer's "U Can't Touch This..." and I was thinking how appropriate of a choice that was just as the lyrics came in.

Anonymous said...

Saw this the day the video came out, but I'm only commenting now
Was too tired from work to make proper comments during the week

Yeah, I fully agree with you'r lil jab at what I like to call "Marvel Karma"
In my opinion, one of the stupidest types of morality found in comics, that essentially says that you should NEVER use you'r abilities to improve you'r living conditions, no matter how hard you try.

I can understand this approach for people like Captain America, who got their abilities intentionally, but people like Spiderman, who could have died from the irradiated spider bite (as shown in at least one alternate time-line), should deserve some compensation, seeing as they never asked for it in the fist place.
This is EVEN MORE true with mutants, who were BORN with their abilities. Taking the Marvel morals further, you should not be allowed to make money from physical labor if you are of an athletic built, or for research if you have a high intellect!

Even the Incredibles pointed out just how stupid these standards are!

In fact, I'm kinda disappointed that neither the DC or Marvel universes have shown any alternative career choices for superpowered individuals other than superhero (which usually isn't paid) or supervillain
You would think they'd findd other uses for people like this!
Not sure if you watch Avatar (the TV show, not the movie), but I really like how the world has specially work positions specifically for people with powers, and how they even have their own sport leagues!
The only time I think comics did this right was in Alan Moore's Top 10

Well, at least DC allows their characters to be happy

le-messor said...

Wow! You used something I said - about exclamation marks. Thank you!
... but I think you misunderstood the point a little. It wasn't that they thought people wouldn't notice them, it was that the printing presses of the day wouldn't print them. (Or would make them look like any of a dozen random marks on the page.)

Technically, Mercury isn't winged. He wears winged sandals.
Also, he wears a Flash Gordon t-shirt in some concerts, with the same lightning bolt. Which I would've used...
Uh, sorry. Different Mercury.

JB: "Mirror room torture : It seems to come from the Phantom of the Opera (Leroux's novel) which features a similar torture chamber."

That chamber used heat for torture. The mirrors were just there for effect (to make the room look like a vast desert).

Final anonymous: I agree. Everybody should watch the cartoon: Avatar: The Last Airbender.

AussieDragoon said...

By any chance next year or the any years following this that this is continued, could you do the originals of DC/Fawcett's Captain Marvel and Marvel's Captain Marvel (of the Mar-Vell variety). I think it'd be cool to compare and contrast the two, their origins and their MOs, since the internet is so fond of doing so.

Anonymous said...

Actually in later stories it is revealed that Jay Garrick when he is the Flash, always maintains an inner vibration so his features are slightly blurred.

starofjustice said...

Personally I always thought it a funny coincidence how the Flash's wife had the same name as one of the animators for the Bananaman cartoon.

Anonymous said...

Welcome to Villain Origins Month!
Today: Lex Luthor!
An experiment went wrong that made him lose all his hair when he was a teenager, he blamed Superboy and got mad. (No, seriously.)

Ozma said...

"These Mirror Are Stealing My Mind!"

I laughed for a good 3 mins

Anonymous said...

HALP, Linkara!! I can't find all the Secret Origins episodes under a single category!!!

Great show (once again) but for the Flash' origin, how could you miss out on "The Colors--The Colors, Man!" cliche--especially with the Purple Haze clip?

Too predictable?

Maybe...but then again...

le-messor said...

Aren't all the Secret Originses in Novembers?

~ Mik

Dullahan said...

'Dismay of scientists'. No kidding, the powers the different Flashes have shown is enough to make a physcist cry.

Just so you know, I'm a big fan of your work Linkara, keep up the good work, this review is great.

Jesse Saunders said...

I don't care if every review you ever make is filled with OMD jokes, I will never get tired of them, and Marvel really does deserve it